Is the “Text Message Fight” Good or Bad for Couples, You May Need a Therapist?
Fexting is the new way for couples to communicate their feelings. When couples are face-to-face, they can easily get caught up in an argument and lash out at one another. Sometimes this confrontation leads to harsh words that can be difficult to take back or forgive. Fexting gives couples a chance to process their emotions without being too vulnerable in front of each other—or so they think! I’ve worked with several married couples who use text message fighting as a way to hash out their problems before they come face-to-face on an issue but you may need a therapist. Our psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner, Akos Antwi, was interviewed by Popsugar about Fexting, here’s our take on Fexting.
Fexting can be a useful tool, but couples should lay down
The arrival of mobile phones has made it easier than ever for couples to communicate with each other, but it’s also opened up a whole new set of issues. Texting is especially dangerous because it can be done in secret and requires no physical interaction between people. This can be good if you’re trying to avoid an argument—but if you’re not careful, your communication could end up being negative and hurtful.
Here are some tips on how to use texting as part of a healthy relationship:
- Set ground rules about what’s appropriate or not (for example, don’t send anything that would make your partner uncomfortable).
- Don’t start fights over text messages; talk face-to-face instead if possible!
- Don’t send pictures or videos of yourself in an embarrassing situation; remember that once something goes out into cyberspace, there’s no taking it back!
Can “fexting” help a marriage?
Fexting is not just the use of text messages to fight. It can also be used to express affection or love in a relationship. In fact, some people argue that couples who ftext are more likely to stay together than those who do not, as they have established clear boundaries for how they will communicate with each other and may be more willing to talk things out instead of reaching for their phones first thing in the morning.
Would you recommend leaving an in-person fight to battle it out via text?
Yes, I would recommend texting as a tool for couples to use in the heat of an argument. However, there are ground rules that must be laid down in order to prevent conflicts from escalating.
First, couples should establish a rule that they cannot text each other while they are physically present in the same space. This ensures that you don’t run into your partner while he or she is on his phone and vice versa. The last thing you want is for your partner’s phone to ring unexpectedly during one of your arguments and cause tension between both parties!
Second, if it’s clear that neither person wants to text at this time then both parties should refrain from doing so until after the argument has passed. It’s best not to initiate contact until one person has cooled off enough so that there won’t be any cause for further conflict between them; this should apply whether or not their feelings have changed since their last communication! Lastly—and most importantly—if either party feels overwhelmed by emotions (especially anger) then we recommend leaving the house altogether if possible before texting anyone else about what happened earlier today.”
Is there a benefit to writing out your feelings, rather than spewing it directly from your mouth, you may need a therapist.
The benefits of writing things out can be vast. First and foremost, it allows you to get your point across without becoming frustrated or overwhelmed by the conversation itself. If you’re feeling emotional, then it’s easy to say things that are hurtful and unnecessary. Writing things down can help you get your emotions in check so that when you finally do decide to speak up, you’re more likely to articulate yourself clearly and effectively.
In addition, writing out what’s on your mind gives you time to think about what it is exactly that bothers or concerns you about your partner’s behavior. You may feel upset at first because of something they’ve said or done—but if given some space and time (i.e., not immediately engaging), we can often realize that our initial reaction was based on miscommunication or misunderstanding rather than actual malice from our partners.
Are there ground rules or boundaries that can be put in place like “no screenshots” etc.
There are many ways to fight in a relationship. Some people prefer the phone, some don’t like talking on the phone and would rather text. Texting is a form of communication and can be used as an effective way to communicate with your partner. However, when it comes down to it, there are a few things that you should think about before deciding whether or not this type of fighting is right for your relationship.
The first thing that you should consider is if this method of conflict resolution works for both parties involved in the argument and their situation specifically at that time. If both partners agree upon using this method then it will work well but if one person doesn’t want to use texting as their primary means of communication then they will most likely get frustrated by having their attempts ignored or even worse – responded with aggression instead of understanding or empathy when communicating through text messages only!
What are alternative ways to fighting if a couple hates face-to-face confrontation?
If your relationship is currently in a state of war, it’s important to stay mindful of how your actions will impact the relationship. There are other ways to communicate than text message, and if you’re not careful about how you approach the situation, it could take years for your partner to forgive you. If this is something that concerns you, then consider some alternative ways for couples to resolve conflict:
- Use a mediator or therapist. This can be useful if both partners want to remain together but feel unable to talk out their issues on their own.
- Try talking face-to-face (or over the phone). You may be able to talk more openly without worrying about hurting your partner’s feelings as much as sending an angry text message would do!
- Write down what each person feels strongly about before heading into any kind of discussion so neither person feels threatened by anything said during this time period; this way everyone has more control over what happens next!
Have you worked with couples who use texting to communicate intense emotions?
Yes. In fact, I’ve worked with many of them. Many people use texting to communicate more intense emotions because they don’t want to hurt their partner’s feelings or they don’t want their partner to hear the emotion in their voice when they talk about something difficult. This can be good for a relationship—it can show that people care about each other enough not to fight face-to-face if it would cause too much stress on the relationship—but it also means that texts tend toward the impersonal side of things and leave out important details about who’s saying what and why.
Texting can be a useful tool, but couples should lay down some ground rules before they start. Would you recommend leaving an in-person fight to battle it out via text? Is there a benefit to writing out your feelings, rather than spewing them directly from your mouth? Are there ground rules or boundaries that can be put in place like “no screenshots” etc.? What are some alternative ways to fighting if a couple hates face-to-face confrontation? Couples therapy can nurture healthy, loving relationships and heal deeply rooted relationship issues